When A Patient Asks You Out On A DateCreated by:
So a few months ago I did a simple teeth cleaning on a patient, in the multi-specialty clinic that I worked for. I noticed he had heavy accumulation of plaque on the lingual surface of his anterior teeth and I explained that it's because of his severely crooked teeth. I asked, "Have you ever considered getting braces?" And he said, "I have. I almost got it too, but then I changed my mind. But I really wanted." We talked about the rates and then he asked if I had a clinic outside and I said, "Yes, I do". When I finished, he asked for my card and said that he'd think about the braces and then he'd let me know.
That night I got a message request on Facebook (only friends can message me)--it was him. "Doc please add me", then he reminded me who he was--proceeded with the normal flattery and said, "I had so many questions about the treatment but I was mesmerized by you, so I lost my words". I laughed because I never really know what to say when these things happen. But then he goes, "I'd really like to see you again, outside your clinic. Let me know when you're free. Let's hangout, maybe for coffee?" I was really surprised because I just treated this patient that afternoon and he's already asking me out for coffee. Anyway, I said NO and I gave my reason. I tried to be really nice about it because he's a patient and I'm often conflicted when it comes to these things. But I may have been too nice because a few days after he asked me a second time and then a third---afterwhich I said: "Oh my gosh. No means, NO". He finally got it.
I feel I've done something wrong but I also think that he's too forward---and probably does not have respect for ME or boundaries. I don't know. I've had patients that liked me, before, but never someone this forward. I'm never rude to patients, even when they're difficult, but this one was just asking for it. Anyway, has this happened to you---and have you gone out on a date with a patient before?
P.S. I have gone out on a date with a patient--but not this one (now, that's a different story).